And We Call Them: Lessons Learned

Some things that I feel are worth noting when attempting to navigate dating, relationships and the opposite sex... please enjoy.

- If they say, "I love you" and you think, "You don't even know me"... RUN!!

- If you don't like someone on the first date, the 2nd 3rd 4th and 5th wont change that.

- Even the innocent seeming ones can be two-timers (or, in my case, three-timers!)

- Southern accents, while sweet sounding, cannot completely make up for general stupidity and douchebaggery.

- If you pegged him as a sleaze-ball when you met, remember that when he tries to pursue you-- it will save you time AND unpleasant emotions

- Exes are such for a reason (and usually MANY reasons!!!)

- If he asks you how your ovaries are on a 2nd date... RUN!!

- If he faux-punches your abdomen and references your unborn fetus... RUN!!

- Making out with a guy, and leading him on, to ultimately "burn" him, in defense of a friend's honor may make you feel like a bitch-slut... but it also may make you feel powerful and amazing... and certain guys deserve that.

- Crushing on a teacher or professor is a great way to keep your grades up.

- Don't date rich Jesuit Republican Yachters if you're a middle-class Pantheist Liberal Tree Hugger.

- Building intimacy is just that: building/ construction, it takes time and is TOTALLY worth it.

- When it's right, the timing may be all wrong-- but that wont matter.

- You can never take back hurtful words.

- You cannot "unintroduce" sex in a relationship, so getting to know someone before jumping in the sack is a good thing.

- It is difficult to sleep alone once you're used to sleeping with him.

- Love forgives... and forgets, but mind forgives... and remembers.

- Sometimes, souls choose to travel together through the lifetimes.