Tippee Canoe and Tyra Too!

Tyra Banks is everywhere! And by everywhere I mean that the Oxygen Network may as well be renamed in her honor!

Seriously, if it's not an actually Tyra show it's America's Next Top Model or a commercial about how, not to fret, because Tyra will be on your TV soon.

I had a sneaking suspicion that this was the case. However, my back is out currently and has been all week. This also means that I am, shall we say, properly lubed-up for this type of investigative journalism. My lube is in the forms of pain killers and muscle relaxers. And you know what? These pills are very becoming of Tyra insofar as my perception of her goes. That is to say, I can not only stand to watch her, but I also have been finding myself enjoying it! To this end, I am quite shocked!

I have actually heard a Mother tell her Daughter, "I think you just need a Tyra," referring to, of course, Tyra's riveting talk show where she ALWAYS manages to bring the topic back to herself! Mostly, I cannot stand this, but drugged up? Well, I think I need a Tyra or two too!! (God, I love me some alliteration!)

In the full-awareness that this may make me come off as a Tyraphile: how cuuuuuute are her bangs in the photo on the right? So cute. That's the answer.

You know, this happens to me quite often... I have love/hate/love/ hate relationships with some celebrities. Most notably, "The Boss", Bruce Springsteen comes to mind. But right now, I love me some ridiculousness that is Tyra! Only you, Tyra, can find a way to make absolutely everything about YOU. Only you Tyra, could spend three to five minutes lecturing your models on how to "smile with your eyes"-- all the while making some of THE MOST entertaining (and weird) faces that I've ever seen. Only you Tyra, only you.

Only you Tyra, could do a talk show about teen abusive relationships and, as one of your guests shows the bloody-reminder of a beat-down no one could have deserved, what do you do? Why, you bring the show back to what it's really about, you! I know it sounds like I'm dissing, and I guess I am; but I'm lovin' me some Tyra and that's the truth! The things that I usually find reprehensible about her I am finding to be both endearing and entertaining.

See? Tyra is so comfortable with her body that she'll wear a bathing suit on her show just to show you that she doesn't care... or, really, to show you that she's lost weight under the guise of not giving a shit. Only you Tyra, only you! And the audience goes wild!! There's another piece of entertaining insanity for ya! Tyra is obsessed with herself and the audience just eats it up... makes me wonder, what does that say about us? You know, those who find great schadenfreude in watching her? "Like, she should be embarrassed, right?" But she isn't. And that boggles the mind. She is for real, for real. And, damn, is she making banks of money! Partly because this semi-coherent rant has gone on for long enough but more so because I need to lay down, I do leave you to stew on all the is Tyra, finishing off this entry with lovely ANTM photo of Tyra showing "her models" how to be ladies, enjoy:

classic Tyra.